Faith Talk · motherhood · Ramadan Reflections

Mom’s Ramadan Reflections – Day 9: Moms who Pretend

Sometimes your kids are driving you bonkers, and you’ve already vented too much to your mom and your friends and your social media community (LOL). So then there’s only one avenue left to cope: to pretend. Pretend everything is okay, until it actually is.

It sounds a bit crazy, but the reality is, most moms at any given point in their lives, have to pretend a little. Pretend to be put together, pretend to be sane, pretend to be having a good day, pretend that their children are angels – when in reality they are Tom and Jerry reincarnates who run around the house all day wreaking havoc on your home and mind.

When you’re a mom of young ones and hormonally as stable as an IKEA table, this day to day crazy can feel a little too crazy.

So go ahead, pretend. Pretend that you’ve got a handle on things. Pretend you’re put together. Pretend that your girls are not pulling each other’s hair as you’re typing this. Sometimes pretending that it’s all good somehow relaxes you enough to be able to deal with things in a better way.

Here’s an example:

I read a letter board on Instagram that said “Patience is what we have when there are witnesses.” So true!

Imagine this scenario: When you’re at a birthday party, and your kid is lying down in the middle of the room having a meltdown because they also wanted to blow out birthday candles; you are as patient as a saint. You pretend that you’ve totally got the situation under control. You speak calmly, softly, gently while encouraging your child to get up and calm down, because you are aware of the audience. You can’t afford to lose your cool so publicly. So you pretend that this is how you always handle things. And guess what – you successfully end up getting your kid to listen to you, and help them understand that they can only blow candles on their own birthday. And afterwards you realize that you could’ve done this all along. Sometimes pretending makes you perform better than being yourself!

If this same situation had happened at home; you may have yelled, sent your kid to timeout, and there certainly would have been some tears. Yours or theirs. But today, pretending saved the day. Pretending gave you a coping mechanism to get through and come back at it when you’re stronger or more mentally prepared.

So if today’s one of “those” kinda days, just take a deep breath, ignore it and pretend that everything’s alright. And before you know it, it actually will be. 🙂


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